


When I/You Leave

by kihyunyoo



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Apologies, M/M, Relationship(s), changki, changki rise, idk what is this called, letter?, point of view?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-20 09:41:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9485444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kihyunyoo/pseuds/kihyunyoo
Summary: There's always two sides in every story





	

**Author's Note:**

> IDK WHAT IS THIS

_When you leave, I want to see your face for the last time._ Those precious out-of-this world dimple that I've always adored. And your perfect smile that no one can resist. _I want to hear your voice._ That honey-like melody every time you sing. The way you lull your head back when you laugh, and the way your eyes turn crescents- it had always been my favorite.

 _I want to touch your skin, I want to feel the pain of you leaving. I want you to tell me that you don't like me anymore, that you don't want me anymore, that you're falling out of love, and I want to watch you fall out of it._ So I would know, and I won't wait.

 _When you leave, I want you to look at me without the flame in your eyes,_ so I won't hope that there's still maybe some kind of spark left for us, _then I will stare at you while you're losing your admiration._ While you're falling out of love for me. _While our promises are becoming plain words, and that we will be facing the world— apart._ You chose to go and turned your back. 

_I won't ask you to apologize. No, I don't need your apology, your excuses and your "sorry"._ Your actions proved that you no longer want me. That I became just another lover for you. _But do me a favor; offer me closure. Please, give me that goddammed closure._ So I can get past from this storm that you've made, and thrown at me.

_When you leave, I want you to spare me a word. Because there's nothing more painful than knowing that I'm not worth a try— nor a single goodbye._

Farewell, Yoo Kihyun.

 

 _When I leave, know that I never want to see your face again._ Your perfectly shaped nose, and your thin yet lovely lips. _I never want to hear your voice._ How deep and masculine it is. How every word coming out from your mouth is music to my ears. _I never want to touch your skin, like how I never want you to feel the pain of my leaving._ It's never my intention, and you did nothing to stop me.

 _But, I want to tell you that I still like you nonetheless. I still want you._ And no, _I am not falling out of love. And I do not want to watch you fall out of it._ Please don't fall out of love for me. Don't just stand there and look, maybe we can turn things around. I will hold your hand tight, so please, stop loosening the grip.

 _When I leave, I don't want you to look at me without the galaxies in your eyes._ I was so used to being your world, your center of attention, but now I can't even see the reflection of my shadow. _I will not stare at you, my universe, and search for everything we've lost, like our promises that have become plain words, like our future that we will now be facing— apart._ I cannot look at you without shedding a tear, for you are everything I've worked so hard to keep by force, but I lost.

 _For the umpteenth time, I'm sorry. You need to hear my apology, because I will not do you a favor; I won't offer you closure. Please, I do not want this to end. Stop letting us end. Don't be the one to let us go._ I cannot give you what you want because for the first time in years, I want to spoil myself. I want to be selfish. Yes, I want you.

 _But, when I finally leave, I want you to remember my silence. Because there's nothing more painful than knowing that for whatever we were worth, I tried my hardest to stay—while you tried your best to bid me goodbye._ You chose to let me go and turn my back but I forgive you for not doing anything to make me stay.

Goodye, Lim Changkyun.

**Author's Note:**

> PLS SEND HELP


End file.
